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AsliMasti
Selected AsliMasti Jokes
1)
TEACHER: What a pair of strange socks you are wearing,
one is green and one is blue with red spots!
ROHAN: Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair
just like that at home.
2)
TEACHER: "George Washington not only chopped down his
father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do
you know why his father didn't punish him?"
ROHAN: "Because George still had the axe in his hand?"
3)
Betson got arrested and was brought before the Judge. 'Who brought you in?'
asked the Judge. '
Two policemen, Sir.' 'Drunk, I assume?' 'Both of them, Your Honour, both of them.'
4)
The scene in the film was tense and the audience sat enthralled. Suddenly, the
hero slapped the heroine on the face.
In the silence that followed, a young
voice piped up: 'Why doesn’t she hit back like you do, mummy?'
5)
A shoplifter was caught red-handed trying to steal a watch from an exclusive
jewelry store. "Listen," said the shoplifter, "I know you don't want any trouble
either.
What do you say I just buy the watch, and we forget about this?" The
manager agreed and wrote up the sales slip.
The crook looked at the slip and
said, "This is a little more than I intended to spend. Can you show me something
less expensive?"
6)
A class was going on... The teacher asked a boy : If you have 12 chocolates and
from that you give 3 to meena, 4 to sheena and 5 to sita.
what will you get???
The Boy replied (after sometime) : Sir!!! 3 new girlfriends!!
7)
An enthusiastic door-to-door vacuum salesman goes to the first house in his new
territory. He knocks, and a real mean, tough-looking lady opens the door.
Before
she has a chance to say anything, he runs inside and dumps cow patties all over
the carpet. He says, "Lady, if this vacuum cleaner doesn't do wonders cleaning
this up, I'll eat every chunk of it."
She turns to him with a smirk and says,
"You want ketchup on that?" The salesman says, "Why do you ask?" She says, "We
just moved in and we haven't got the electricity turned on yet."
8)
This dumb guy walks into the library, looks around, then gets in line for the
counter. Once he gets to the head of the line, he loudly says, 'I'd like a Big
Mac, large fries, and a large Coke.'
The librarian looks at him for a moment.
Then whispers, 'Mister, this is the library.' The man nods. Then he WHISPERS,
'I'd like a Big Mac, large fries, and a large Coke.'
9)
A kangaroo kept getting out of his enclosure at the Patna zoo. Knowing that he
could hop high, the zoo officials put up a ten-foot fence.
He was out the next
morning, just sauntering around the zoo. A twenty-foot fence was put up. Again
he got out.
When the fence was forty feet high, a camel in the next enclosure
asked the kangaroo, 'How high do you think they'll go?' The kangaroo said,
'About a thousand feet, unless somebody locks the gate at night!'
10)
Little Tommy's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police
station. There they saw pictures tacked to a big bulletin board.
The label
clearly read, "The 10 Most Wanted." One of the youngsters pointed to a picture
and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person.
"Yes," said the
policeman, "the detectives want him very badly." So Little Tommy asked, while
tugging on the man's belt, "Um, mister, why didn't you keep them when you took
their pictures?"
- AsliMasti Jokes Archive
(stuff@aslimasti.com)
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